The Holidays are approaching! Isn’t this time to celebrate? Not for just anyone. If you are single fearing being alone during the holidays, ones might want the festivities to help you pass as quickly as possible. “No time of the year might be consequently dark, uncomfortable and annoying”, you tell yourself”; “If only I had someone to get with, things would have recently been different”, you whisper to yourself time and again.
Using the holiday season to think these over may also help you understand the true reasons for your failures. You might find, for example, that there are patterns of behaviors that repeat themselves throughout your past-relationships which always triggered conflicts between you your partners.
The secret to doing so is developing Self-Awareness: getting to understand why you wasn’t able to develop a successful closeness so far; what made most people fail in your relationships until now. Is it really so that you merely didn’t come across partners who were good enough for you? Is it actually so that there were “external conditions” which made it impossible to be able to develop and maintain a successful closeness?
The odds probably do not operate in your favour! Therefore, it is up to you to do something on the subject of your situation. Therefore, you may want to use the holidays this year to figure out how to make a change for next season! How can you use this year’s excursions to become able to have a romance next year?
What makes you think that between occasionally a miracle will happen and out-of-the-blue you will have a wonderful romance? If you have been failing in having a wonderful relationship until recently, what are the odds that you will reach your goals in having one next 365 days?
Using the holidays’ the perfect time to figure out what are the true reasons for your inability to have a serious, meaningful, satisfying intimacy, is mostly a time well-spent. The topic you’ll gain will provide help to find a suitable partner with whom to develop and maintain a successful intimacy.
Use the excursions to figure out how not to be alone next year. You may realise that such advice is normally ridiculous. Why to think about up coming year when this year’s holidays are approaching? Graphs simple: if you have been simple for a long time, what guarantee do you have that you will not be single next year as well?
Could it really be you ought to did all you could to get a partner with whom to develop a good relationship but don’t have luck? Well, all of these can serve you as arguments and rationalizations to not being a success. But is it really the court case? Or could there be other reasons for your failed attempts? Could it be that an item in you hinders and prevents you from developing a successful relationship?
Or you might find away that you haven’t been successful locating a partner until now not simply because no “suitable” partner originated your way, but because you had been over-afraid about developing a long-term serious relationship (for one reason or another); and also that you are so needy and dependent on whomever you shut off with that they terminated the relationship; or that you were so controlling and demanding more and more of your dates just invalidated your attempts to getting nearer and maybe even to moving in together.